So, I've got this really killer headache; it's so bad that I occasionally have to laugh out loud at the ridiculousness of the pain 'cuz dang! This hurts so bad, it's funny!
Call me crazy; you may be right, who am I to say? When it comes to physical pain, though, I find I can breast storms a lot better when I talk to the pain. "Hey Migraine!" I say (aloud), "suck it! You're not the boss of me! What, you think you can get me down? You think you can make me stop livin'? Bring it, Migraine; I'm not afraid of you. You picked the wrong guy to mess with, yes sir; I'm not afraid of you! You thought that, by waking me up in the middle of the night, you could keep me from getting up this morning? Well, you thought wrong, sucka! I am up! And there ain't nothin' you can do about it. If it's a battle of endurance you want, just let me remind you that, when I die, you can't go with me, so get your kicks in while you can 'cuz I'll spend most of eternity forgetting all about you. Bring it, Migraine; I'm not scared a you."
I did this a couple weeks ago when my stomach got so angry at me that I could hardly stand up sometimes, but I told that pain who was boss and, though I don't think trashing talking my ailments makes them go away any more quickly, I find that I'm eventually laughing at me and my strangeness and not really caring about the pain at all.
So. Yeah, my head hurts so bad that I can feel it all the way down my spine and in all my joints, but who really cares?
Bring it, Migraine; I ain't afraid of you!
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ReplyDeleteHow sad that it will take you most of eternity to finally forget.....
Two thoughts:
ReplyDelete1.)I hope Sean Needham never reads this post because he will slap you all the way to Pluto with angrily instructive remarks on what a migrane (and/or planet) REALLY is. Apparently, if you're feeling well enough to think you don't have a migrane. Actualy, I've had one official migrane and my cousin used to have to take medicine for them. By all accounts, Sean would be right. Mine gave me roving blind spots in my vision just before sending a premature apocalypse that reduced me to ashes. Using the word migrane to discribe a headache that does less than make you vomit and/or curl up in a ball is the least PC and/or most offensive thing you can do around someone who's had one. Here's one final "and/or" just for kicks.
2.)No way! Somebody else talks to their body when it's angry? Amazing. I thought I was the only one. Interestingly enough, something that I recently studied said that embracing and fully experiancing fear and pain rather than fighting it or running from it is often very effective in reducing it. That may or may not be true, but anything that justifies my schitzophrenic mutterings is OK in my book.